I'm Right Here
by LiLiKun18
Summary: Bluebird's Illusion Fic, Post Veggie!Ed ending. The two brother's have gone through everything, and they've gone through it together. But now Al is on his own. How can he get his big brother back? Sad and Sweet. Brotherly Love. No Pairings.
1. Birds

Overall, it was a lovely spring day. The birds were chirping, the flowers had finally begun to bloom. Everything felt safe and peaceful. Alphonse decided it might be a refreshing change of pace to go out today. The fresh air would do his brother good.

"Good Morning, Brother!" Alphonse said brightly as he opened up the bedroom curtains and let the light illuminate room. The sudden change of contrast blinded Alphonse temporarily. He had to blink for a few moments to be able to see inside the dark room. To his disappointment, his brother hadn't reacted to the change at all. Edward was propped upright in bed, staring straight forward with a dull glaze over his eye. He gave no sign he sensed his brothers presence. Alphonse smiled and moved so he would be in Edwards line of vision. "It's such a nice day, why don't we go out? You'd like that wouldn't you?"

"…" It felt like Edward was looking right through him, there wasn't any focus in his eyes, none of the ambition or light they once held. It was the worst part. It was like looking a corpse in the eye. Alphonse continued to smile though, and he began to ready his brother for the preannounced outing. He continued to talk too, speaking about the weather and some letters he received from central, and some interesting leads he found in one of their fathers old books, anything to help him ignore Ed's silence.

"Do you want me to braid your hair brother?" Al asked, noticing that his brother's messy ponytail was beginning to come undone. "Here let me fix it…" Alphonse pulled out the band and rearranged Edward's hair so it fit into a neat braid. He had grown accustom to this over time, but he still wasn't as good at it as Ed was. He remembered those frantic mornings where Ed had over slept. His brother had been able to braid his long hair in a matter of moments, while still finding time to shove food into his mouth. It was funny, but Al kept expecting Edward to pop up out of that bed as he usually did, screaming that he was late and needed to get moving, and asking Al why he hadn't bothered to wake his big brother up sooner.

"When will everything be normal again?" Alphonse asked himself quietly as he began shifting his brother into the wheel chair that was resting beside the bed. For the last four years, he had wanted nothing more then to return to his old body, to be able to feel and sleep and be human again. Now here he was, as normal and healthy as any other boy his age, and he would've given anything to be back in the armor suit if that meant his brother would be there beside him.

Getting Edward down the stairs and outside took a little work, but Alphonse managed ok. After a few minutes the two were slowly making their way around the fields of Risembool. "What a nice day huh?" Alphonse smiled at his brother. Edward sat quietly with a blank expression. Alphonse wondered what he was thinking about, if he was even thinking to begin with. The inside of Edward's brain was a mystery these days.

"Brother! Look at that," Alphonse exclaimed happily pointing at a baby bluebird that was sitting in its nest. "I think it's going to try to fly."

The baby bird sat on the edge of the nest, testing the air. Something must have told it that it was ready, because on a moments notice it suddenly pushed off and began fluttering excitedly around the air. It was still very young so it beat its wings downward, landing on the armrest of Edward's wheelchair.

"Look Brother!" Alphonse said. Edward stared straight ahead. The baby bird hopped and beat it's wings against Edwards good arm, but the alchemist paid it no mind. There was something about that moment that suddenly made Alphonse frightened, this picture of birds landing on his brother without Ed's consent. He didn't like it. "Sh-Shoo!" he told the bird. "Go on!" The bird flapped its wings and tried to get away as quickly as possible. It faltered and tumbled to the ground, then began flapping it's wings again until it had managed to flutter back to its nest. Alphonse breathed a heavy sigh and looked back at Edward. He hadn't moved, he was still staring deadly at the air in front of him. Alphonse went back to the wheel chair and began pushing his brother once more.

"I'm so selfish…" Alphonse muttered to his brother. "All I do is depend on you, even now I can't do anything to help you…" Edward didn't respond.

"If you were here right now brother, and I was the one who was like you, you would've found a way to fix me by now wouldn't you?" Alphonse looked down at his brother. Nothing.

"Brother?" Alphonse asked again. His brother was staring straight ahead as always. Maybe there really was nothing inside of him.

"What am I thinking?" Alphonse chuckled, pushing. "You'll get better brother, no doubt about it." The two continued down the path.

Edward felt far off and scattered. He didn't know what had happened and he didn't know where he was. He had a vague feeling somewhere inside of him, like all the pieces were there and he just had to fit them together, but he couldn't. He was sure of one thing though; somewhere he could hear a voice. He knew that voice. Who's was it? He couldn't understand what it was saying, but it was the sound that felt real. "I'm here…" he wanted to say. "I'm right here, but where are you?"

The voice was soft, and he knew it. Who's was it? The question haunted him for the eternity he had been in this strange dark limbo. "I'm here…" Something important, something he needed to do, or had cared immensely about. Something that was precious. "I'm right here…don't go."


	2. Theories

A vegetative state, that was the simplest way anyone could describe Edward's current condition. Alphonse found himself disagreeing with that statement. He'd heard of other cases of people who were comatose, and he found none of their problems had stemmed from a human transmutation. No, Alphonse had a feeling that Edward's mind wasn't even there anymore. So it all came down to whether or not Alphonse could find a way to pull it back.

"It's just like how you pulled my body out of the gate," Alphonse found himself explaining to his brother one afternoon. "I just have to find a way to pull your mind out, that's all there is to it."

That was the easiest option. The one Alphonse had been trying to avoid. He wasn't stupid, and he knew that human transmutation was an idiotic response to his brother's condition. When had human transmutation fixed anything? All it had brought to his life was pain and suffering, and yet…

Alphonse pushed those thoughts from his head and instead began focusing on his brother's daily needs.

"It's about lunch time now, are you hungry brother?" Alphonse asked.

"…"

"You never take care of yourself," Alphonse chuckled quietly. "You always work too hard, and I have to remind you to eat and sleep." He could almost hear Edward give an unhappy grunt, and remark that Alphonse needed to stop being a mother hen.

Since Edward's mind had faltered, the two boys had been borrowing a room from the Rockbells. It was appropriate since Winry was Ed's mechanic. Next to Alphonse, she spent the most time with him. Alphonse sometimes heard her talking to him.

"_You're such an idiot Ed. How could you do this to yourself?"_

"Your getting down here pretty late this morning," Winry smiled cheerfully as she looked up from some of the parts she'd been tweaking. "Stay up late studying again?"

"Dad had some notes on the human subconscious, I thought there was something in there that could help brother." Alphonse explained as he looked through the cabinets for something brother could eat.

There was a short silence before Winry asked, "Did you find anything, you know, _useful_?"

"Not really," Alphonse sighed. "The only thing that was pretty helpful was a little section that listed the brains physical composition. That could be handy." _If I ever did try to…_

"Don't push yourself to hard," Winry smiled. "You need to take care of yourself too."

"Right…" Alphonse smiled back.

"And don't try anything to crazy," Winry added "Even if Edward did get better, if you got hurt in the process he'd never forgive himself."

"Hm…" Alphonse kept his eyes on the plate of food he had prepared for Ed.

Winry looked like she wanted to say something else, but instead she went back to the parts on the table. Al in turn went back upstairs to feed Ed.

Alphonse remembered the day he told Winry what had happened. It had happened over phone.

"_Rockbell prosthetics" _

"_Winry?"_

"_Al? Is that you? What's wrong? You sound really awful."_

"…"

_ "Al? What's wrong? Did something happen?"_

_ "Brother's kind of sick. I think we're coming back to Risembool for a little while, just until he gets better."_

_ "What! Edward? Is he ok? What do you mean until he gets better?"_

_ "Don't worry it's all going to be fine."_

_ "Al what happened?"_

_ "…"_

_ "Alphonse don't you dare hang up-"_

_ "Click"_

A few days later Winry found out for herself. It looked like Edward had made her cry once again.

Over the course of his coma, Ed had received a very large amount of attention. Mrs. Hughes and Elicia had come up for a visit three times now. Each time they had brought an apple pie for Ed, and one for Alphonse as well. General Mustang was a frequent visitor. It was no secret he felt partially responsible, and he also seemed happy to escape all of the paper work he had waiting in central. Riza often accompanied him. Major Armstrong had made a very startling visit. He had bawled the entire time, and to Al's horror, he had almost smothered Edward in a large embrace of _supportive affection. _Izumi had managed a trip out to Risembool as well. Alphonse remembered the awful look she had worn, when she saw her pupil. Alphonse knew just how hard on her that was. She had been the one who had warned Al about using human transmutation to help him.

"I don't care what theories you've made, or any of the ways you think you can justify it." She had said very harshly. "You will not use human transmutation, do you understand."

"Yes teacher…"

"Human transmutation is the reason your brother…It's the reason all this has happened. Do you hear me!'

Alphonse flinched. "Yes teacher."

"You have to swear, Alphonse,"

"I swear…"

Yet here he was, staring into his brother's blank eyes, and considering it. He remembered what happened the last time he hadn't listened to teacher. He knew it was worst decision he could possibly make at this point, but it was an option. Brother looked so dead and helpless, and Alphonse had an option that would help him. What to do, what to do?

"What am I supposed to do brother?" Alphonse asked late one night, after Ed had fallen asleep. "What choice am I supposed to make?"

_"Just think about yourself this time Alphonse, "_

_ "Brother please, don't!"_

_ "Sorry,"_

_ "BROTHER!"_

"Why can't you ever hear me?" Alphonse sighed as he closed his books.

There was so much Alphonse wished he could've asked Ed right now, and not just the questions concerning human transmutation. He wanted to ask his brother why he would've given so much up for Alphonse's sake. He wanted to ask Edward if he was sad, or if he was lonely. From time to time he also wanted to know things he'd never bothered to ask Edward before, like why he chose to grow his hair so long, or the reason he didn't like getting shots, or sometimes just a simple question about whether or not Edward remembered all the times they'd spent together as a children. It's true, you never know what you have until it's gone. Alphonse just wished he'd learned that lesson the first time around.


	3. Night

"Brother?" Alphonse whispered quietly as he creaked the door open. Edward's loud obnoxious snores filled the room. "Brother, are you

awake?"

"I am now…" Ed grumbled sleepily as he turned over in bed.

"Can I sleep with you tonight? I had a bad dream…" Ed lifted his head up to see Al better.

"Wouldn't you rather sleep with mom?"

Alphonse fidgeted nervously. "She's really been tired lately, I dont want to wake her up..." He whispered.

Edward let out a long sigh before rolling over to make room. Alphonse quickly scurried into the bed and hid his face under the

covers.

"No complaining if I kick you, ok?" Ed grunted.

"Yeah that's fine..." Alphonse whispered back. He scooted closer to his brother. "Hey Ed?"

"Hm?"

"Thanks..."

"Dont mention it, now let you big brother get some sleep ok?" Ed yawned.

"Oh! Right."

After several minutes Ed began snoring again. Over the years it was a sound Alphonse was very used to after staying awake each night

listening to his brother talk in his sleep. It was strange watching Edward sleep now without snoring. Alphonse found that was something he

missed a lot. It felt like nothing was familiar about Ed anymore.

Alphonse woke up to find he'd fallen asleep in the middle of research again. "Winry was right," he thought out loud. "I really do need to

start taking better care of myself." He looked over at Edward, who was fast asleep at this hour, even with

the lights still on. Alphonse went over to the bed and sat down next to Ed.

He observed Edward very closely, it was almost like looking at a different person. It really was incredible how much emotion and personality affected what a person felt like. He touched Edward's hand lightly feeling his warm skin. Alphonse remembered for a moment a time when he couldn't feel anything at all.

"Brother? Are you awake yet?"

Edward didn't stir, his eyes remained close as he slept peacefully.

Alphonse sighed and pulled himself up. He went back over to his books and began to clean up his scattered notes. "Really," Al said to himself. "I'm think I'm coming to pieces brother, I can barely look after myself now, much less you."

Something about that made a loud snapping sound inside Al's head. Much like the bird that had landed on Ed's chair. He looked down in his hand to see he was holding a book about beginners Alchemy.

"Look brother? Brings back memories huh?"

"Yeah I guess..."

Alphonse felt sick to his stomach looking at that book. Why had he and his brother ever even found it? Why had they become alchemists to begin with? Was this really all that was going to come out of it?

No, there had to be some way! Equivalent exchange right? The two of them, they'd given up so much. There had to be a way Alphonse could pull Edward back.

There had to be an option of some sort...

An option...

Alphonse rummaged through his father's notes until he found what he was looking for.

"Human Psyche Transmutation..." Alphonse said out loud. "The transmuting of the human mind..."

He looked over at his brother then back at the book. He sighed before closing it up, and turning off the light. He didn't feel like walking to his room tonight, he'd just sleep with Edward. It wouldn't be the first time he'd done so.

He climbed into the bed still wearing all his clothes and curled up next to his brother. Alphonse sighed and looked up at the ceiling. "I'll get you back brother...no matter what it takes."

Alphonse had a hard time getting to sleep that night. His brother's silence was far to loud.

* * *

It was so dark...

For a moment the world became clear to Edward.

The voice had called him, and he had recognized it. He had felt himself and his being, even if it was only for a moment.

It had been dark, and quiet, and there had been someone next to him who's presence had been safe and warm. He had known it. For one desperate second everything had been in place and Edward had understood what was going on.

But then the curtains closed and Edward was floating on nothingness again.

The warmth was gone and the understanding had faded.

He was back with the scattered shards of what had once been living.

For a moment he saw an image of a boy, then a suit of armor, then the boy again.

He saw a bloody floor, and a mangled and deformed corpse.

Thousands of different circles, each with some different meaning.

Metal limbs...

Armor,

Circles,

Warmness,

Light,

Dark,

Blackness,

Blankness,

Something he had to do,

Edward felt it slipping through his fingers, and he faded into the nothing, forgetting once again that he was a person, or that he was even anything at all.


	4. Testament

"Knock Knock Knock!"

"Winry!" Pinako yelled from the back of the house. "There's somebody at the door, go answer it!"

Roy inhaled nervously, trying his best to look as relaxed as he could.

"Just a minute," Winry called as she began undoing the lock. "Oh! General Mustang?" The General nodded his head at Winry.

"Sorry for dropping by with no notice, but I was just in the neighborhood and I thought-"

"No it's fine," Winry smiled gesturing to the General to come in, which he did. "We were just about to have dinner anyway, I'll go put another plate on the table."

The General shook his head. "No that won't be necessary, I won't be able to stay that long." He smiled apologetically. "I just came by to check on Alphonse, and to make sure that you and your grandmother were doing alright.

Winry smiled and did her best to ignore the awkward tension that was building. Roy guessed it was obvious he wanted to check on Edward too, but he wasn't about to say so. Not right now at-least.

"Well Alphonse is upstairs at the moment, I'll go call him." She smiled. "Please take a seat."

Roy sighed and sat down. If anyone had been paying attention to him they'd of noticed how stiff he was.

To be completely honest, Roy had no idea why he'd felt the need to come up today. There had been a kind of bad feeling he'd had in the pit of his stomach that morning, like the kind he got when he'd forgotten something very important.

If his experience as a soldier had taught him anything, it was that it was always best to go with your gut in situations like these, and Mustang wasn't about to take any chances.

"Alphonse!" Winry shouted. "Come on! General Mustang is here to see us!"

She glanced at the General, "Sorry, usually he's more polite." She called Al again.

"Has he still been searching for a cure?" Roy asked tentatively.

"Yes," Winry sighed as she went over to join Mustang in the living room. "He's been really intense about it lately, he hardly comes down anymore..."

Roy nodded understandingly. "Would it be alright if I just went up and talked to him?" Roy asked. "There's been some things I've been meaning to talk to him about, and some questions I've wanted to ask him."

Winry furrowed her brow and gave Roy a look, then sighed. "Yeah, sure go ahead."

"Thanks," was really all Roy could say at that point.

He slowly went up the stairs. He was used to the house by now, so he knew which room he was headed to. He got to the door and knocked.

"Alphonse? It's me, General Mustang."

There wasn't an answer from the other side of the room, which made Mustang feel increasingly more uncomfortable.

"There's something I needed to tell you about Edward-" Roy opened the door.

The discomfort in his gut turned cold and dropped, leaving Mustang feeling sick.

The room was completely empty, Ed and Al were no where to be seen. Roy noticed that Ed's wheel chair was also missing.

"Wha? What the hell is going on?" Mustang hissed as he looked around.

"Is something wrong?" Winry called from downstairs.

"There gone! Both of them!"

"What!"

Roy heard Winry hurrying up the steps and running down the hall. "Where did they go?" She breathed as she reached the room and saw that it was empty. She walked around the room slowly. Everything had been as it was last night, with the exception of Al and Ed and the wheel chair. "Why would they just leave?" She then noticed the tiny scrap of paper that was folded neatly on Edward's bed. She picked it up slowly and un-rolled it.

_I thought've what I would say if there ever came a time I would have to deliver my last words to someone. Sadly all I can really say is I'm sorry, thank you for everything you've done for me, but it's time I paid brother back for what he did._

_Edward will be back soon, tell him that he shouldn't do anything to help me, whatever happens._

_Sorry Again._

_-Alphonse_

_(P.S. Tell teacher I'm sorry, but this was something I had to do)_

"No..." Winry re-read the letter, then another time. "He can't mean that?"

Outside the sun was going down.


	5. Resemblance

Alphonse had to be the biggest idiot to ever perform human transmutation. This was the very Alchemy that had made teacher so sick, that had destroyed his body, that had taken his brothers limbs and his mind, and here he was doing it all over again.

He vaguely wondered if the fact he knew it was stupid, meant he should quit now and go back to his original theories.

No, Alphonse might've been stupid but he knew how the gate worked. If you wanted something from it, you better be willing to sacrifice all that you had. It was either your life or someone else's.

"Equivalent Exchange..." The phrase had almost become mocking. So far Alphonse had found very little in life that proved those words right.

He looked down at Edward. He was slumped over in his chair and wrapped in a blanket, a dead glaze over his eyes. Alphonse was pushing him down the dirt road outside of the Rockbell property. He'd figured if he was going to do this, he was going to do it somewhere Winry and Pinako weren't going to see it.

In his arms he held a number of books and supplies that had everything he needed in order to summon the gate.

"Don't worry brother," Alphonse said, sounding as cheerful as his broken voice would allow. "You're going to wake up tomorrow, and everything will be Ok."

Edward said nothing.

It wasn't long before Alphonse realized the path they were taking was leading them to their old house, or what was left of it anyway. He could vaguely see the withered black tree against the horizon.

_"Guess this means there's no turning back now Al..."_

_"Yeah..."_

Something in the back of Alphonse's head began talking to him.

_"Alphonse, why are you doing this? Your brother gave up so much for you, and your just going to throw it all away? Look at you! Your alive! You can feel and smell and act like a normal human."_

"I don't deserve that, not at the cost brother paid..." Alphonse said to himself.

_"Your brother made his choice, he got what he wanted didn't he? You benefited, can you really deny him this much?"_

"I want my brother to live the way he used to, to be happy for once..."

_"Are you sure? What if you fail? Then all of your brother's sacrifice will have been for nothing, and you will both die..."_

Alphonse wondered what it was he was hearing. Maybe it was his common sense, or his survival instincts, possibly his conscience? Maybe Alphonse had finally gone insane. Whatever it was it wasn't going to change Al's mind.

"No turning back, right brother?"

Ed said nothing.

Sometimes Al wondered if he talked more to himself then to Edward. Chances were Edward didn't care either way.

They were now standing at the threshold of what used to be their home. Black woodwork and scorched furniture was scattered everywhere.

Alphonse left Edward there and began marking out a transmutation circle on the stone floor of their father's ruined study. It seemed appropriate to Alphonse. This is where their journey had started, this is where it would end. For him at-least.

It was then Alphonse noticed something. Alphonse looked over at his brother who was staring off into space at some invisible object only he could see. Had his brother felt this way when he had descended into that black basement? When he had drawn out a human transmutation circle with his own blood. When he had lured Al into the center then activated the alchemy?

_"Brother what are you going to do?"_

_"I'm keeping my promise Al..."_

_"Will you be restored too?"_

Ed hadn't answered then either, even though he could've if he'd wanted to.

_"BROTHER! LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME PLEASE!_

Alphonse felt sick to his stomach. He kept seeing that nightmare replay itself, day in day out.

_"BROTHER WHAT DID YOU GIVE IT?"_

_"..."_

_"BROTHER ANSWER ME PLEASE! PLEASE BROTHER!"_

"Have to keep going..." Alphonse moaned, as he finished the border of the circle.

_"EDWARD! EDWARD! EDWARD!"_

Alphonse was so close now. Everything was all set, it was as perfect as it could be. He dragged Edward into the center of the circle, leaving the chair behind.

"Brother..." Alphonse smiled as he held Edward's limply. "I love you, ok? So don't worry about me, think about yourself. You've done enough..."

_"Just think of yourself Al..."_

_"Brother No! Stop! NOOO!"_

_"I love you Alphonse..."_

Alphonse looked into his brother's dead eyes one final time before pressing his palms together and activating the transmutation circle.

A large eyeball opened, and reality began to spin, Alphonse could feel himself unwinding and rewinding. Both his body and his brother's were being broken down by the forces of Alchemy.

_"This is it..." _Alphonse thoughts were racing as the strange sensation split his body in two. _"Am I going to die?"_

Alphonse watched as his brother began to disappear before his eyes. He reached for his hand. _"It's worth it I guess if brother gets to live..."_

Alphonse reflected on all the things he had wanted to do in life, all the things he would have liked to have had. It's funny how short life was, fifteen years had felt so long and hard, but it was all going to be gone in the blink of an eye.

_"I hope it's nice..."_

_"You idiot..." _The voice in Al's head remarked.

_"Oh now I get it, the voice...it's brother isn't it...I'm imagining brother's voice aren't I?"_

The last thing Al heard before his entire body was gone was his brothers voice shouting sarcastically, "Dammit Al, your supposed to learn from your brothers mistakes..."

Then the world was white, and there was the gate.

Funny, but Alphonse had a feeling it had been waiting for him to make a stupid mistake like this one.

_"You're just like you're brother..."_

_"Yeah...I know..."_


	6. Apprehension

Staring at the Gate was like staring at a ghost. It was a feeling Alphonse had hoped he would never have to experience again.

"Well I expected you might turn up to save your brother," Alphonse didn't miss the condescending tone that was being used. "So what do you plan on giving up?" The Gate asked this question casually, staring at Alphonse with non-existent eyes.

"What do you want from me?" Al asked quietly. "How much will it take to get brother back?"

The Gate seemed to find this funny. It snickered quietly, smiling contemptuously at Al with it's enormous grin. Al glared back.

"Look, I'm not here to play games," Al spat. "Just tell me what I need to do!"

"What are you going to give?" the Gate asked again, ignoring Alphonse's previous statement. "How much will you provide for your brother?"

"Anything you want, just let him go!"

The gate chuckled. "Well Alphonse Elric, is your brothers life worth your own?"

Alphonse took a step back. He hadn't been expecting that. "I-I don't know...but I'll give you whatever it takes..."

"Do you have a philosophers stone?"

"...No I don't..." Sacrificing himself for human transmutation was one thing, sacrificing others was completely different. That was something Alphonse knew Edward would disapprove of, but then again he'd probably disapprove of what Alphonse was doing right now.

"Oh well, that's too bad." The Gate grinned in a sadistic kind of way. "You really are alot like your brother."

Alphonse's stomach began to knot up nervously, and his eyes widened. Of course, there was nothing in the world Alphonse could've given for Edward, and now he was going to die here.

The Gate continued to smirk. "Why don't you go get him?" It suggested in a mocking tone.

"W-What do you mean?" Alphonse stammered.

Then the Gate opened, "Go meet your brother," the Gate chuckled, "...and then we'll see what happens." Dark hands shot out and grabbed Alphonse pulling him into the otherside.

"Stop! Wait!" He screamed as he grabbed the hinges.

"We won't meet again Alphonse Elric, please send your brother my regards."

The Gate slammed shut and Alphonse found himself floating in complete and utter darkness.

"Brother?" He called, "Brother?" For the first time in a long time Alphonse felt like crying.

He failed. He and Edward were going to die, because he was stupid enough to trust the gate. No, no it couldn't end like this, after all they'd given, was this really all that was left. "Brother?" Alphonse wailed, "Brother I need you, I don't know what I should do!" His voice echoed off into nothingness, and no one answered.

"Please brother..." Alphonse cried. "Please..."

Then he heard it.

"...Alphonse..."

Alphonse's heart skipped a beat. The voice was dry and airy, more like wind. Alphonse tried to determine where it was coming from, but there was no direction to follow.

"Brother? Is that you?

"...Alphonse..." There it was again.

"Where are you? Brother?"

"...Alphonse...Here..." A small blue light appeared before Alphonse. "Here..."

Alphonse slowy moved towards it, or was it moving towards him? Alphonse's sense of reality felt hazy, and his heart beat was pounding in his ears. Was it really Ed? After all this? Was it really? The light illuminated the darkness, and consumed Alphonse with a warm feeling.

"...I'm...here..."

The Gate stared at the closed doors and turned to look at his counterpart.

The other Gate resembled Edward greatly, but he was blurry like he'd been shot out of focus. His right arm and left leg on the other hand, seemed to be much more defined.

"Well?" Edward's gate asked, "What do you think he will do?"

Alphonse's Gate continued to smirk. "Will wait and see what he gains and what he loses."

"Equivalent Exchange?" Edward's Gate asked with an inquisitive smile.

"Indeed..."


	7. Intermission

It had been four days.

No one had managed to find the two brothers. Edward's wheel chair had been located over by the boy's old house, along with a strange transmutation circle. Other than that they had disappeared without a trace.

Sig found that at this point it seemed pretty obvious what had happened. Izumi's stupid pupils had disobeyed her again, and if Alphonse were here at the moment she would have taken the liberty to smash his face in. But he wasn't there. As far as anyone could tell, he and Edward weren't anywhere.

The minute they'd found the note, Roy, Winry and Pinako, had immediately gone out to find the two boys. An hour or so laters when they found the circle and Edward's chair, they assumed the worst. All that was really left to do now was to wait. Wait and see if Edward and Alphonse came back, or if they really had...

"My stupid, stupid students..." Izumi murmured staring off at nothing. Sig, looked over at her. The two of them had come on the second day, after Winry had called them. Izumi had read Al's note, then crumpled it and thrown it away, saying Alphonse was a good for nothing moron who who knew no more about alchemy than his damn brother.

She had spent the last day stationed in the Rockbell living room, thinking. On a few occasions she would mutter something to herself, but mostly she was silent. Sig knew how she felt. For her, it was as if she was losing her baby all over again. She was too proud to admit it, but this had hit her hard. She wasn't the only one though.

Life at the Rockbell house had had all but halted. Winry who was usually busying herself with automail parts and different types of mechanics, spent most of her time wandering around Risembool by herself, like she expected Ed and Al to just appear. Pinako had closed the bussiness temporarily, and was also neglecting work that should have been done.

Sig had been trying to help Pinako with whatever it was she needed. He preferred to be of some use. On the morning of the third day Sig had been in the kitchen using his talents as a butcher to help prepare dinner for later. Izumi was also present, but she was sitting at the table staring out the kitchen window. Winry wandered in.

"Did anyone found anything while I was asleep?" she asked. She probably knew the answer though. Izumi shook her head, but continued to stare. Winry looked disheartened. She took a seat at the table as well, and began fiddling with one of the salt shakers.

"Hopes not lost yet, right?" she asked quietly, talking more to herself than to Izumi or Sig. "I mean...Al gave something right? So  
there's still a chance-"

"Let me ask you something." Izumi cut off. "Which is better? Having one of them back? Or neither?"

"What?" Winry's brow creased in a confused expression.

"If you had to choose, would you let them both go to their deaths, or would you let one live without the other."

Winry looked at Izumi, "One of them should live right? I mean at-least one of them is alive"

"I don't agree..." Izumi mused.

Winry's wide eyes narrowed, and the softness of her voice began to freeze over. "You'd just let the two of them die?" she asked, "That's not-"

"Those boys doomed themselves the minute they tried to bring their mother back."

"How can you say that?" Winry shouted. From where he was standing Sig could see tears beginning to well in her eyes. "The two of them worked so hard and they never once lost hope that they could get their bodies back."

"Really?" Izumi snapped. "Look at their actions and tell me they didn't lose hope."

Winry stopped. A few drops of water had fallen on to the table cloth and were soaking in.

A silence fell over the room. Izumi sighed. "Edward knew," she continued "he knew in his heart it would take more than a philosophers stone to save Alphonse. He tried to ignore it for all those years, but in the end all he did was destroy himself. And and as for Alphonse his actions were no different." Izumi's gaze was somewhere faraway, and her voice had become almost like a whisper. "Those two, they can only bring each other back so many times. The two of them should die together, and finally end this cycle of trying to save the other one."

Winry stared at Izumi, her eyes looked wide and frightened. It was apparent she was now wondering if Izumi was right. "No...no th-that can't be right..." Her shoulders began to shake.

Izumi glanced over at her sadly. "You love them don't you?"

Winry paused when she heard that, and she suddenly began to steady herself. She looked up, her eyes were fiery and determined.

"Edward and Alphonse wouldn't die and be happy!" her fists clenched and her teeth were tightly gritted. "I'm not waiting for one of them, I'm waiting for both." She stood up and took a deep breath. "Maybe you don't believe they can do it, and maybe they don't either, but I won't lose hope yet. I don't want to!"

Izumi looked surprised by Winry's proclamation. The room was silent. The tension radiated in every corner, and Sig  
could feel the two glaring at the other.

The silence was broken by the sound of a phone ringing.

"That's General Mustang..." Winry said out loud, the fiery anger evaporating. The general who had been unable to escape his duties back in Central, (to his utter disappointment) had been calling close to every other hour. Winry turned and rushed to pick it up, leaving Sig and Izumi alone.

Sig waited patiently for Izumi to speak, focusing on his meat.

"Silly girl..." Izumi sighed as she turned back to the window.

"You want to believe they'll both comeback too, don't you?" Sig stated kindly. "Don't bother hiding it I know to you to well."

"Wishes and dreams are the same as doing nothing." Izumi snapped.

Sig sighed, "Do you really believe they'd be happy to have died together."

Izumi was silent and contemplative. "I don't know..." was all she said. "I can think about it and rationalize it, but in reality I guess I don't know..."

Sig abandoned his work and went and wrapped his arms around her. There were drops of water on Izumi's side of the table cloth as well.


	8. Whisper

Alphonse was standing in a meadow. It was dark, and thousands of stars lit up the sky. The grassy plain stretched out as far as he could see in every direction. There wasn't a building or a landmark or anything of the sort.

"Wha-What happened?" Alphonse blinked. For some reason he couldn't remember anything. It was like that feeling where you wake up and you don't know where you are. For some reason he was drawing a blank.

Alphonse sat down a took a deep breath. It was probably best at this point to sit down and take time to collect his thoughts. Given the situation Alphonse should've been worried out of his mind, but for some odd reason he felt calm. Maybe it was the quiet meadow.

A soft wind rustled through Alphonse's short hair. He looked up at the stars and sighed. It was starting to come to him now, he was looking for brother.

_"Did he get lost?" _Alphonse wondered aimlessly. He wasn't exactly sure, but he knew he needed to find him. If he didn't something bad was going to happen, but Alphonse couldn't remember exactly what the consequences were. It didn't take him long to figure that he wouldn't find his brother if he was lying here, so he got up and began to walk.

Alphonse had no idea which way he was headed. It all looked the same to him. He figured if he kept walking he would get somewhere, so he continued on.

The wind continued to blow gently through the air. Alphonse thought he heard something whispering to him through it, but the words lost all meaning by the time it reached his ears.

"How big is this place?" Alphonse wondered out loud. He had to have been walking for hours now, but the field still stretched out forever.

"Something isn't right here..." Alphonse realized. He remembered oily black hands, and a bright grey eye.

"I'm in the Gate aren't I?" Alphonse looked around as the rest of his memory returned. "Am I dead?" He asked himself. "That would make some sense..."

"Yes but what is sense when you think about it..."

Alphonse spun around in surprise. "Who said that?"

"What's real and what's fake? What's right and what's wrong? What's life and what's death?"

Alphonse looked around the field but could not find the source of the voice.

"Do you know where my brother is?" He asked it cautiously.

"No" The voice answered. "I'm just here,"

"Where? I don't see you?" Alphonse pointed out.

"I'm right here."

Alphonse still didn't see anything.

"Do you know a way out?" He asked the voice. "I need to find my Brother and I can't just sit around in here."

"I know a way in, is that what you mean?"

"What do you mean in?"

"You just go in that door."

For the third time, Alphonse tried to see what the voice was talking about.

"I can't see what your talking about."

"..."

"Hello?"

The voice was silent, and only the wind answered as it brushed up against him. Al sighed and continued walking.

"Use the door silly!"

Alphonse jumped. The voice was so loud this time, it almost sounded like it was right behind him. "I can't see any door."

"Of course you can't, your eyes are open."

Alphonse furrowed his brow. "If I close my eyes, I'll see it?"

"Maybe, maybe not."

Alphonse sighed. What a vague response. He looked around one last time and then closed his eyes.

For some reason he felt like he was floating. He opened them and he was standing in the field. Then he closed them again and was met with the floating feeling again. He slowly began to feel his way around in the dark for whatever it was the voice had been talking about. He felt his hand wrap around something cool and metallic, a doorknob? Slowly he turned it and moved forward.

"Al?"

Alphonse opened his eyes, then blinked a few times to make sure he wasn't seeing things. "Winry? What are you doing here?"

Sure enough, there she was. It looked like he was sitting on one of the sofas in the Rockbell house. Winry was bent over some diagrams like she'd been working.

"What do you mean Al? I do live here." Winry laughed jokingly.

"B-but I thought I was in the Gate?" Alphonse didn't understand what was going on. Did he escape? Had it all been some crazy hallucination?

"The Gate? What's that?" Winry looked genuinely confused. She brushed some hair out of her face and put it behind her-

Alphonse noticed something.

Winry looked younger. It wasn't that large of a difference, but Alphonse could see she was missing a few piercings and her hair was a few inches shorter. This was two or three years ago. Alphonse looked down and saw huge hands clad in metal and leather. His armor?

The scene suddenly made so much sense. He remembered this day! He and brother had come back for repairs after an incident with a few robbers. Which meant-

Alphonse whirled around to see the person who should've been right beside him. "Broth-"

He stopped. No one was there.

"Winry!" Alphonse cried. "Where's brother?"

"Who? Alphonse what're you talking about?" Winry asked curiously as she turned back to her mechanics.

"Where's Edward? He should be here!"

"Edward? Al your not making any sense."

Alphonse felt cold shock beginning to envelope him. Why didn't Winry know this? She knew Edward, what was going on?

"Where is he?" Alphonse shouted.

"Shut Up Al!" Winry turned and glared at him. "Why don't you quit it with the stupid questions."

Everything suddenly froze in silence. Winry's hateful statement hung in Alphonse's mind, echoing in a nostalgic kind of way.

He stared at Winry in utter astonishment. "What did you just say?"

Alphonse took a sharp intake of breath as it dawned on him. He couldn't believe this. Not because hearing Winry scream at him had surprised him in anyway. Not because she had flat out denied his brother's existence. It was what she had said. It sounded just like...

_Brother! You didn't drink your milk again did you? You should take better care of yourself. _

_"Aghh...Shut up, what's with all the nosey questions anyway? I don't have to drink it if I don't want to." _

Suddenly Alphonse was up and he grabbed Winry by her shoulders. "Where's Brother!" he demanded. "Where is he?"

"Alphonse stop! That hurts!" Winry cried out. All traces of Edward's voice were gone.

"WHERE IS HE!"

Alphonse felt the floating sensation again.

"WHERE'S EDWARD!"

"He's sleeping sweet heart."

Alphonse gasped. His voice suddenly caught in his throat. Was he still holding on to Winry? No, his hands felt too small. He looked up.

"Mom?"

"It's ok, you just had a bad dream..." Trisha smiled as she ruffled Al's hair. "Edward's fine, you kept calling for him."

"He is?" Alphonse whimpered pitifully as he clutched his mother. How long ago was this? She was dead wasn't she? Her smell, her voice, it all felt the same. This was his old room. It was just like it used to be before it had all been consumed in fire.

Alphonse felt tears welling up in his eyes. He hadn't cried like this since Mom had died. Edward had always called him a crybaby back then.

"Shh...it's ok..." she cooed, patting his back and holding him close. "It was all just a bad dream."

"Edward...was sick," Alphonse wailed. "and you weren't there, I was all by myself..." Alphonse wasn't sure what was happening, why he was acting like this. Was this another memory?

"None of it was real," Trisha hushed. "I'm here, and Edward's fine..."

"It was just a bad dream?" Alphonse wanted to believe that was true, but it wasn't. He felt cold. He looked up and saw that he was standing in front of his mother's grave.

_"...all just a bad dream..."_

Alphonse sighed and curled up in front of it. What did all of this mean? Was he really still in the gate?

He felt the wind flow by him again, he heard something.

_"Alphonse..."_

Alphonse stood up and looked around. "Edward's in here somewhere, isn't he?" He asked his mother.

_"You're such a smart boy..."_

"Do you know what to do?"

_"He's your big brother dear, I wonder where he could be hiding."_

That sounded like something Trisha would've said to Edward, not Alphonse. Especially since Alphonse was more prone to hiding.

_"Where do I look?"_

_"I can only say so much, but you're my little genius, you'll find him."_

"Mom..." Alphonse sighed.

"_I love the both of you, no matter what happens..." _

The wind whistled strongly for a final moment, then everything was completely still.

He sadly looked down at the Grave. He couldn't remember the last time he has visited her after Ed had become colonel. If he ever did make it out of this mess, he decided that would be his first order of business.

He gazed at it for a few more moments before shutting his eyes.

He felt himself floating through space once more, then there was something solid beneath his feet. Where was he now?

"Why if it isn't our beloved little side hero."

Alphonse eyes shot open. The cold voice alone was enough to make a shiver run through his nerves.

"You..." he spat. "Why are you here? Why?"

Envy smirked horribly. "That's a very rude way to say hello."


	9. Authenticity

"Go away!' Alphonse scowled.

"Well see I can't do that, I'm stuck here." Envy smiled.

"What do you mean?" Alphonse asked suspiciously.

Envy sighed and gave Alphonse a rather annoyed look. "You still don't get it do you?"

"Get what? What're you talking about? Where's brother?" Alphonse couldn't help how furiously he was attacking Envy with questions. After all, this was the bastard that had wrapped Ed's neck in a rope and left him to die in the first place.

"You see Alfred," Envy explained. "The place were in right now, it's your brother's mind..."

Alphonse took a step back. "What? His mind?"

"What's left of it anyway." Envy sighed. "None of it makes any sense right?"

Alphonse thought about it for a moment, then nodded.

"It's all memories and feelings jumbled together," Envy smirked. "From what I can tell he's been trying to put it back together." Envy rolled his eyes, and glanced around. "He hasn't been doing a very good job, you've seen some of his mistakes haven't you?" Alphonse remembered the strange conversation with Winry and the wind that sounded like his mother.

"That doesn't explain why you're here." Alphonse pointed out. "I thought you escaped after the incident."

Envy smiled at Alphonse evilly. "See, I'm just a memory too." Envy shape shifted. "I'm what you would call his fears."

Alphonse swallowed as he looked at a reflection of himself. Envy smirked, making Alphonse look very demonic.

"He's afraid of me?" Alphonse asked his copy. Envy stopped smirking, and made his face look very grave and serious.

"I hate you brother, how could you do this to me? My bodies gone, what do I do now?"

"Stop it!" Alphonse yelled. Envy shape shifted back into himself. He glanced at Alphonse with a ruthless grin.

"Oh he hates that one," he chuckled. "It's really quite funny, how easily you could destroy your brother if you wanted to."

All Alphonse could do was glare furiously. Envy continued. "Oh there are other things that get him too..." Envy explained, "Like this one for example."

Envy shape shifted into a little girl with big blue eyes and long brown hair. "Big brother, don't you wanna play with me?" Alphonse bit his tongue and stared at Nina. Her innocent features became threatening, and then Envy was back.

"Heh heh, you didn't like that one?" He chuckled. "Well what about this?" He shape shifted again, this time into a horrifically mangled corpse. "Edward...why? It hurts..."

"I said stop it!" Alphonse screamed. "Just stop!"

Envy came back. "Does that bother you?" he asked. "And here I thought you hated your brother."

"Shut up!" Alphonse yelled. "I've had it with you!" He ran at Envy. Envy simply moved out of the way. He looked at Alphonse. There was a gleeful malice in his eyes.

Alphonse gritted his teeth, "I don't have time for you," He snapped. "Where's my brother?"

Envy shapeshifted. "Right here Al."

Alphonse felt himself freeze. Then he was shaking. Was that what Edward had sounded like? His voice sounded like that didn't it. Alphonse stared at the perfect copy of his brother. He was just like he used to be, he was healthy, and his eyes were filled with life.

"Stop it please..." Alphonse whispered. It was like looking at a dead person.

"Awwww, now isn't that adorable," Envy laughed, still remaining in the form of Edward. "armor boy misses his darling big brother."

"SHUT UP!" Alphonse screamed, going at Envy again.

"Calm down," Envy sighed as he shape shifted again, and side stepped the attack. He looked at Alphonse, who's face was clenched in grief and anger. Envy grinned. "Tell me, what's the point in retrieving your brother if your going to die?" Envy asked curiously.

Alphonse shot him a nasty glare. "It's because I love my brother, and if I do this then maybe he can live and be happy."

"You realize that means you won't ever see him in life again," Envy pointed out gleefully.

Alphonse paused for a moment. "I-I know I'll never see him again, but it would be for him so it's ok..."

"Wrong," Envy sighed. Alphonse looked up and his face hardened again,

"There's nothing wrong about it, I'd be saving him, I don't care if I have to die to do that!"

Envy rolled his eyes, "You obviously have no idea who your brother is." He stated plainly.

Alphonse looked at him questioningly.

"The reason you have to save him is because he had to save you," Envy pointed out. "Don't make you brother out to be that selfish. If he found that you'd killed yourself do you honestly think he'd be pleased?"

"Why do you care?" Alphonse spat.

"I think your forgetting something," Envy pointed out. "I am your brother, just like everything else you've seen in this place." Envy's grin widened as Al looked up again. "He's creating this, so who have you been talking to?" Alphonse thought about that. Edward was creating this? That made sense, but so far his brother was no where to be found. If this was Edward's mind then where was Edward. That made Alphonse realize something. He got up and looked around the space he and Envy were in. It was a huge room that stretched upward as far as Alphonse could see.

"Brother?" Alphonse called. "Brother it's me, I need to see you."

Envy started laughing. "Aha now you're getting it, and I thought you were an idiot." Alphonse rolled his eyes and continued calling Edward.

"Brother, come on! I know your in here." Alphonse shouted. His voice bounced off the walls and echoed eerily.

"Keep trying," Envy snickered. "The pipsqueak will show up sooner or later." Alphonse looked over at Envy and got an idea, a pretty bad idea.

"Hey Envy, you said Edwards creating all of this right now, right?"

"That's correct," Envy sighed. "And he's creating you right now, right?"

"Yeah I guess, what are you trying to get at?" Alphonse remembered the way Winry had reacted when he had asked her about Edward's location. If he could pull this off now...

"Envy," Alphonse suddenly exclaimed. He did his best to sound as loud and superior as he could manage. "Has anyone ever told you how small you are?" Envy immediately stiffened. Alphonse grinned, Edward was not liking this.

"What are you talking about?" Envy smiled. "You think if you tease me enough you brother will come out? It'd be easier to tease the walls don't you think?"

"I don't know, but you seemed so much taller out in the real world, in here you look really shrimpy." Alphonse shrugged, watching Envy out of the corner of his eye. Envy's hands had curled into fists.

"Seriously kid this isn't funny."

"Your almost as short as Edward." Alphonse mused. Suddenly, he felt something hard come slam into his right cheek.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL HE MAKES CAN'T EVEN REACH A DOORKNOB YOU IDIOT!"

The impact was enough to send Alphonse flying. He landed face down on the floor. Funny, but all he could think to say was, "That one didn't make sense brother." He pulled himself up and turned.

It was Edward, not Envy in disguise, or a brain dead body. It was him exactly as he was moments before he disappeared. Why? Why did he feel so calm right now? He'd spent the last few months wondering if he'd ever see life in his brother's eyes again, wishing he could speak to Edward and hear a response. Yet this felt as normal as if it were any other day, and the two were having an idle chat. Edward looked at Alphonse and scowled.

"It's you own fault, you shouldn't have called me small," he sniffed.

Alphonse smiled. "I've missed you, it's been a while." He stammered nervously.

Edward shot a glance at Al but continued pouting. "What you thought I wasn't coming back, idiot."


	10. Comprehension

For some reason, seeing Edward again was a bit more anti-climactic then Alphonse had anticipated. That's not to say it wasn't emotional or important, but Alphonse had envisioned something a bit more…enlivened.

Edward sneezed and looked at Al. "So what've you been up to?" He asked bluntly.

"N-nothing much, just some medical research," Alphonse stammered.

"Cool." Edward replied.

It was so weird, like nothing had ever happened.

_"This is just like brother,"_ Alphonse thought inwardly. _"He does something stupid, worries everyone out of their minds, than acts like nothing ever happened."_

Alphonse was surprised he could even manage to think about Edward in such a casual way. They should at least hug or something. After all, the last few months had been a living hell for Al.

"I thought maybe there was a way I could help you with the medical alchemy." Alphonse explained.

Edward scowled. "You should've stuck with that. It's stupid to use human transmutation, even if you were trying to help."

"But brother you did the exact same thing!"

"That's different!"

"Whaddya mean it's different!"

"Well I don't know! You were dying! What was I supposed to do?"

"Oh and what? You going brain dead is completely different from an incomplete body?"

"I was going to figure something out!"

"No you weren't,"

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL-"

"Brother!"

"Ok fine, fine." Ed sighed. "We're both idiots." He smiled a bit' when he said that.

"So what've you been doing for the last few months?" Alphonse asked.

"It's been months?" Edward asked surprised.

"Yeah, seven to be exact."

"Really?" Edward seemed to contemplate this for a moment. He looked around at his environment. "To tell you the truth, I don't really know what've been doing. I've been a little scrambled."

Alphonse snorted.

"What!" Ed shouted.

Al raised an eyebrow.

"Ok fine! A lot scrambled." Ed snapped. "My thoughts and memories have been pretty screwed up so I've been trying to get them together again."

"Have you made much progress?" Al asked.

"Some," Ed sighed. "It's been slow going."

"Your personality seems to be coming along quite well." Al commented.

Ed glared. "Don't push it brother,"

"So what are you still missing," Al asked.

Ed gazed around. "Well you see, a lot of it is things like knowledge and memories, specific things I'm supposed to know. I have a basis of what my life out there was like, but a lot of it is feelings."

"Like Envy?" Al asked.

"Exactly, that was a negative feeling of fear, while things like Mom…" Edward paused and thought. "Mom was always…happy stuff, warm feelings."

Alphonse was quiet. "Do you remember a lot about her?"

Edward shook his head. "A few things now and then, but most of it's just the feelings."

"What about Winry, and Aunt Pinako?" Al asked.

Edward stared at him blankly for a moment before something started clicking.

"Oh…those are like images. I can't really put any feelings around them yet."

"All of the stuff we did together, you becoming a state alchemist, searching for the philosophers stone, any of it?"

Edward sighed sadly and rubbed his head. "The most clear memories I have are the night we tried to bring Mom back, and that time under central…you know where I…"

"Blew up your brain?" Alphonse said directly.

Ed flinched. "Yeah…that night."

Alphonse looked at his brother and sighed sadly. "Why did you do it brother? I thought we had a promise."

Edward smiled at him. "Big brother responsibility comes before promises, no way you're dying before I do." Ed smiled. Suddenly he got a very irritated look on his face. "Which brings me to my next point…" he said in a very scary voice.

_"_Brother, I know what you're going to say…" Alphonse sighed. "I know you're angry I'm here risking my life, but I needed to help you." Al explained. "You always do everything by yourself, and you always end up getting hurt." Al looked down as he said this.

Edward didn't look convinced. "How many times do I have to tell you? You don't need to feel guilty about the mistakes I've made." He exclaimed.

"There not all your mistakes brother." Al pointed out. "Besides," He said, changing the subject. "I'm here now, and so lets find a way to get you out of here."

Edward face fell, and he looked down.

"Brother what's wrong?"

"I'm not leaving."

"What?"

Edward looked Alphonse in the eye. "The only way you could get me out of here, was if you stayed, and I'm not going to agree to that." He said, the fire in his eyes glinting. "If I can pull my memories together, I can move on and that's fine with me."

Alphonse stood in shock. "What?" He stared at his brother. "You just won't to stay here until you die."

Edward didn't respond.

"You're kidding me right? That's your plan?" Alphonse asked.

"Look, I made my choice and that's it." Ed explained. "You should go home."

"No! There has to be some way-"

"There isn't one Al!" Ed yelled. "Don't think I haven't thought of every way to get out of here, and there just isn't one."

"Then I'll make one!" Alphonse yelled.

"Slap!"

Alphonse stared at Edward, then brought his hand to his cheek. He looked at Ed. There was anger in his eyes, but there was also sorrow.

"I lost you once…" Edward hissed.

_"Give him back! He's my little brother he's all I have left!"_

Alphonse could hear the memory echoing through Edward's mind.

"I don't ever want to lose you again."

"But what about…?" Al trailed off. He could feel tears welling in his eyes.

"You' think this is right? You can't just die!"

"There's nothing that I can do." Edward looked down. "I'll stay here. It was my choice, so I'll pay the price."

Alphonse felt rage rising up in him. This was wrong; this couldn't be the way things were going to end. He came in here ready to throw it all away. But what was he supposed to do? Edward wasn't going to leave, and even if he did all the memories that were still here would be lost.

"You can't do this…" Alphonse cried.

Ed refused to look at Alphonse, his eyes suddenly looked dead again.

_"No, No, No!" _Alphonse's thoughts were screaming. "_What do I do? What do I do?"_

_"Come on Alphonse…I know you can do better than that."_

Alphonse stopped.

_"You're a big boy, you can figure it out. Just think about it."_

"Mom…"

_"Where is Edward hiding."_

Alphonse looked at Edward, his eyes suddenly wide. "He's still hiding…"

"I'm not giving up on you brother…" Alphonse shouted. "Not yet."

Edward looked up in surprise. "Al what're you doing?"

Alphonse took a step back, and closed his eyes. The floating sensation came again, but this time Alphonse knew what he was looking for. When he opened them again, he saw a little door. It was brown and had a bronze knob. Alphonse knew it well. He walked over to it and slowly opened it up. The room inside was smoky, electrical currents sparking here and there. Of course this is where he would be. He could say whatever he liked, this was what he had hidden his for so long. Alphonse walked farther into the room. The floor was coated in blood, specks of it were even splattered against the wall. Alphonse could see a suit of armor sitting in the corner. He hadn't been here for this part of the transmutation. The smoke began to clear a bit, and Alphonse could finally see the person who was crumpled in a ball on the floor. He was gasping, and crying, and clutching what was left of his leg.

"He's gone, what've I done?" He sobbed.

Alphonse watched sadly as his brother trembled. He looked over and saw a heap of bloody clothing that was sitting on the floor, right where he had left them.

"Alphonse…" Edward sobbed.

"Brother…" Alphonse sighed as he knelt down next to the little boy who continued trembling and crying. "Why do you have to be like this?"

Edward heaved a giant breath and looked up at Alphonse, tears coming down his cheeks.

Alphonse took his hand and put it in his own. "Your not the only one who made a mistake you know."

"Don't die Alphonse," Edward begged. "Please…"

"I won't." Alphonse said. "But I won't let you die either."

"There's no other way…" Edward said.

"We're brothers…" Alphonse said. "Don't carry the burdens on your own." His grip on Edward's hand tightened. "I'll stay with you, we'll bear the punishment together."

Edward eyes widened and Alphonse could feel the rest of the world coming together. The mistakes began rewriting themselves.

"Alphonse…" Edward said. "I'm sorry…"

"Me too brother…" Alphonse could see his brother was back to himself again; he got to his feet and stood firmly.

"So what happens now?" Alphonse asked. They both could feel it. Edward had put the memories back together, and the Gate was ready to consume what was left.

" I don't know…" Edward said. "Maybe we'll both die."

Alphonse watched the blackness begin to seep in.

"Are you worried?" Edward asked.

"No, are you?" Alphonse asked.

Edward smiled weakly. "There's not much that can scare me at this point."

"Liar."

"Shut up…"

The two stood hand in hand as the darkness enveloped them.

"Hey Al?"

"Yeah brother?"

"I'm glad you tried to find me…"

"Heh, it wasn't that big a deal, it was actually pretty stupid."

"So this is it huh?"

"I assume so."

Edwards voice sounded farther and farther away, and Alphonse felt his mind getting foggy as well.

"I love you brother…" Edward smiled as he faded away.

"I love you too…" Alphonse laughed.

The darkness became darker and darker, and for a moment Alphonse felt wind in his hair.

_"That's my boys…"_


	11. Equivalency

"Aghh! Winry get that white crap away from me!"

"Oh don't be such a baby, " Winry sighed. "You spend seven months as a vegetable, you're going to need you milk, now drink up."

Ed scowled and reluctantly picked up the milk. He made sure to gag loudly as he sipped it.

"And to think I ever missed you." Winry sighed.

"How was Alphonse doing this morning?" Edward asked as he put the milk down, and started on a loaf of bread.

"Better, his fever's gone down. If you hurry up and finish that milk you can go visit him.

Edward scowled and starting sipping the milk more quickly now.

"Just wait until my leg starts working again…" Edward grunted.

"Well until then, your stuck in that bed and your going to do what I say." Winry snickered, as she cleaned up the rest of Ed's dishes.

"You're evil." He muttered under his breath.

"What was that Ed?"

"Nothing, Nothing."

"That's what I thought," Winry smiled.

"So does it feel any better?" Pinako asked as she began finished tying the bandage around Alphonse's torso.

"Yeah a little bit…" Al grimaced. He exhaled slowly and clutched his shoulder with his right hand.

Pinako smiled. "I suppose in a way it's what you deserve for being so reckless…" she sighed as she pulled the pipe out of her mouth.

Alphonse laughed a little. "There maybe some truth to that statement." He looked down at his left arm which wasn't there anymore. He wondered if he was ever going to get used to that.

Five days after he had activated the transmutation circle, Winry had found Alphonse and Edward out by the ruins of their old house. Edward had been unconscious and weak, and Alphonse had come close to bleeding to death. His left arm had been severed off at the shoulder.

"So I assume you'll be wanting auto-mail now?" Pinako asked him. Alphonse chuckled.

"Yeah."

"Do you intend on rushing the process and adjusting to it in under a year?" Pinako smirked. "I'll have you know you'll be spitting up blood."

"No, maybe not this time." Alphonse laughed. "It'll be nice to relax for once."

"Maybe you aren't as stupid as your brother," Pinako mused. "But I wouldn't buy it for a second that you and your brother would be settling down anytime soon." She gave Alphonse a wry grin and then tightened the bandage once more.

"OW!"

"Heh heh, silly boy." Pinako grinned.

Automail was even worse than Alphonse had originally anticipated. Sure it was nice to have an arm again, but it was really heavy. Not to mention it burned if it became too hot or too cold. Alphonse wondered which would've been worse. The automail, or the armor?

"How do you stand this stuff brother?" Alphonse asked one day when the two of them were in Ed's room working on a few alchemic theory's.

"You get used to it after a while," Edward said as he turned the page of his book. "After a while you won't feel it anymore."

Edward's recovery was also taking time. Sitting in bed for seven months while being force fed had not proved beneficial to his health. It was going to take time before Edward could get up and walk again, but he had definitely progressed in the last month.

Teacher had warned both Edward and Alphonse that the minute the two of them were well she was going to beat them so hard they would have to recover again. She had screamed it at them actually, along with a few other things that were not fit to repeat.

"DO YOU BOYS LEARN NOTHING!" She screeched. "I SHOULD'VE JUST THROWN YOU BOTH IN THAT RIVER THE MINUTE I LAYED EYES ON YOU."

"We're sorry." Ed and Al cringed.

"YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT YOU ARE!" Sig had to hold Izumi back to keep her from pummeling the two injured boys.

After that she had continued to give them threatening looks, and took to sharpening her butchers knife in the kitchen whenever she knew they were watching.

Winry on the other hand paid no heed to the fact the two boys were hurt, and smacked each of them on the head with a wrench directly after the two had been revived.

"Don't you ever scare me like that again!" She had sobbed as she threw her arms around the two of them, just happy to have them back safe.

Alphonse admitted it things weren't perfect. Edward was troubled with the fact his little brother no longer had an arm. Izumi was probably going to kill them, and the road ahead of them didn't look very certain. But they were alive. They were together and nothing was going to take that away from them anytime soon. Not the gate, not the battle to create the philosophers stone, not even Father. And that was all that mattered.

* * *

Authors Note: This is the second to last chapter, just to let you know. By the way, my friend gave me the idea for Alphonse having automail when she was talking about Alphonse getting off with the best deal since he eventually got his body back and didn't have to deal with any other problems. I thought that didn't seem fair since Al was just as guilty as Ed if not more so. Give all credit to her folks, and thanks so much for sticking by me this whole time and leaving supportive reviews.

-Until the last chapter

Lili


	12. Conjecture

_Human kind cannot obtain anything without first giving something in return,_

_To obtain something of equal value must be lost,_

_That is Alchemy's first and foremost law,_

_In those days we truly believed that was the world's one and only truth...

* * *

_

Alphonse straightened his Automail arm, and then bent it again, getting the feel for the hinges. It felt strange, but Edward had been right about him getting used to it. He looked over at his brother who was leaning on the front steps of the porch.

"You're not going to pass out from effort are you?" Al teased.

"Oh shut up." Edward grunted. "That was only once!"

"Twice brother."

"Whatever." Edward stretched his arms and walked towards Alphonse.

The two stared at each other for a moment. Edward smirked. "So, you still think you can take me on without that big hunk of metal to protect you?"

"If you still think you can fight me without fainting like a lady."

"Jerk."

Alphonse smiled and ran at Edward. Edward moved swiftly ducking underneath his fists and going for Al's stomach. The two went back and forth, ducking and twisting and trying to get at the other ones weak point. It wasn't their best spar. Between Ed's weak body and Alphonse's new automail, both boys were in terrible shape. That wasn't stopping them though. Ed was still quick as ever, much quicker than Alphonse. He ducked a punch then raised himself on one hand trying to aim his good knee into Al's face. Al turned on his feet to dodged, propelling a heavy kick into Ed's stomach.

"Oof." Ed fell backwards, rolled and came running back again.

"If you two break anything don't come crying to me." Winry shouted from inside.

Edward jumped up knocking Al's shoulders and causing him to lose his balance, he then aimed a punch at his stomach. Al switched his footing causing Ed to fall instead.

"Aghh!" Ed landed face down on the grass.

"I win!" Alphonse smiled cheerfully.

Ed responded by grabbing Al's ankles and knocking him down as well.

"I win…" Ed smiled mockingly, his voice muffled by the grass.

"Cheater…" Alphonse whined.

Ed helped him up and the two made it back to the porch steps.

"Today is a nice day…" Ed said with a contented sigh as he sank onto the steps.

"Yeah it is…" Alphonse agreed. The sun was shining and large cottony clouds were slowly drifting across the sky.

"Don't fall asleep with your stomach hanging out." Al advised, noticing Edward's eyes were starting to droop.

"Leave me alone…" Edward yawned.

Al sighed and continued to watch the clouds. "Hey Brother?" he started.

"Mm?"

"What're we going to do now that you're back?" Al asked. "Are we staying in Risembool?"

"To tell you the truth, I honestly don't know." Ed sighed as he leaned back. "I got a letter from the damn colo-"

"He's a general now Brother,"

"Yeah whatever. He says he's expecting to me to report back to central as soon as I'm done recovering."

Alphonse smiled. "He wants you to come back and be a state alchemist again?"

"Of course he does!" Edward looked thoroughly annoyed. "That smug bastard, all he wants is for me to come back and do all his paper work for him while he lounges around telling me how short I am! Lazy good for nothing colo-"

"He's a general brother."

"Whatever!"

Ed crossed his arms and brooded while Alphonse snickered quietly. Roy always liked to ridicule Ed; his leave of absence had not seemed to change that fact.

"So does that mean we're going to central?" Al asked.

Ed glanced over at Al. "Do you want to?" He replied.

Al considered that for a moment. "You know, those homunculi are still out there." Al sighed. "We never caught them back in Central."

Edward's eyes narrowed, then he nodded slowly. "We still don't know exactly what it was they were up to."

The brothers looked out across the green fields. Both of their eyes were focused on the faint outline of a dead tree, and both of them were remembering a day long ago.

_"There's no home left for us now, the only direction we can move in is forward."_

Ed exhaled loudly, then stood up and stretched. "Well I suppose we're going to have to stick our noses where they don't belong again."

"Because that always works for us," Alphonse joked sarcastically.

"History repeats itself." Ed smirked. "We might as well do what we're good at."

Alphonse chuckled then was quiet for a moment. He still found it hard to believe a month ago his brother wouldn't have been able to move or speak, and even harder to believe that two years ago he had been a hollow suit of armor.

"Hey brother?"

"Yeah Al?"

Alphonse looked his brother in the eye. "The burden we bear, it's equal now isn't it?"

Edward blinked. "What do you mean?"

Alphonse gripped his metal arm tightly. "Up until now, you've been bearing a lot of the burden by yourself haven't you?"

Ed looked surprised, but he let Alphonse finish.

"From now on, we won't have to give anything else up to save the other." Alphonse murmured. "We'll gain and sacrifice together, so that way neither of us has to be alone anymore."

Edward stared for a moment, looking a little lost with the new concept. Then he smiled.

"You always have to state the obvious like that don't you?"

"Hey I'm serious!" Alphonse exclaimed giving his brother a shove.

"Ha ha, I know, I know." Ed laughed. He gave his little brother a once over before sighing reluctantly. "You really are such a mother hen." Ed smirked. "I think because I'm the big brother I'm the one who has to take care of everything, but you always go and switch roles."

Alphonse went red. "You didn't need to call me a mother hen."

"Heh sorry, but you are." Ed snickered. He smiled at Al then held out his fist.

"Together, brother."

Alphonse smiled and bumped the fist with his own. "Right."

Suddenly out of no where a carving knife came flying through the air landing inches away from the brother's feet.

"AGHHH!" They both screamed.

"You two seem to have had a spar." Izumi smiled evilly. "Looks like your both feeling much better."

"Teacher! Hi!" Ed exclaimed, his voice a pitch higher than it usually was.

"Brother I'm scared!"

"Come here you little rule breaking bastards."

"We're sorry teacher!"

"Tell it to my fists."

"Aghhh!"

Somewhere else that day, inside of a dead tree, a small baby bluebird poked it's head out of it's ashy black home. It was going to try to fly.


End file.
